Of Love and Betrayal by Louise Lyndon

Author:Louise Lyndon [Lyndon, Louise]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Medieval, Women's Fiction, Historical, Scottish, Marriage of Convenience
Publisher: The Wild Rose Press
Published: 2015-09-15T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Fifteen

Aveline was a sinner.

Well, at least according to Father Alfonse she was. And it was all because she’d been foolish enough to seek him out for advice on her current dilemma. She loved two men. But desired only one.

She sat on the church steps, wrapped her overcoat tightly around her, and rested her elbows on her knees. Sinner. She’d been called many things within her five and twenty years of life, but never a sinner.

Eudes. Troy. Two very different men, but who Aveline owed oh so much to.

First, there was Eudes. He’d come before Troy, and he would always hold a special place in her heart. Aveline loved him for his gentle soul and kind nature. And she owed him her loyalty. The problem was, he did not make her body burn for him. She glanced toward the gatehouse. Had the messenger already reached him? Was he already penning his response? If so, what would he say? What could he say? Would he feel betrayed, hurt, used? Did he know she had not set out to deliberately hurt him? Did he know she still loved him? She always would.

A sudden gust of icy wind whirled around her ankles. Her body erupted into a quick, violent tremor, and in a bid to keep warm, she rubbed her hands together. She should return to the warmth of the castle, yet she wanted to settle her thoughts first.

Not that it surprised her, but it took very little effort to call Troy to mind. He seemed to have taken up permanent residency within her head.

And therein lay the problem.

She could not stop thinking about him. If he was not within eyesight, she would think of ways to “accidently” come upon him just so she could have her fill of him. And when he was within eyesight? Well, she had to stop herself from begging him to touch her, kiss her, to take her to his bed.

She buried her heated face in her cold hands. The mere thought of Troy made her fingers tingle and her belly tighten. Was that love? Or lust, as Father Alfonse had said and as such should be avoided?

Yet, she did not want to avoid it. It felt too good to simply push aside or bury deep within her. But didn’t that mean she was betraying Eudes? Being unfaithful to him? Yes, in the eyes of the church and the law, her marriage to Eudes did not exist, but that did not mean her feelings for him didn’t. Or her sense of loyalty.

Perhaps this was her punishment for taking Bertram’s life. It mattered not to her the reasons behind her doing so, the fact of the matter remained, she had killed someone. And she had stood over his writhing body, his bulging eyes fixed upon hers, and watched as the life gurgled from his fat, sweaty body. She was not a warrior; she did not go into battle and kill enemies before they had the chance to kill her. She was a physician, her role was to try to save and preserve life, not end it.

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